Insomnia
Oh gosh... I cant sleep... Been like that since attachment starts... My system is in a mess... I can go to bed at 9+, wake up at 11pm and never get back to sleep again. So damn sleepy at 9+, basically nothing can get me awake. I can even sleep on the sofa... Otherwise, I can wake up every 1 to 2 hours. I need QUALITY SLEEP! What's happening to me?
Hmmm.... Attachment is tough, especially under him... Haiz... Faced lots of problems there... Dont expect an easy life there.
WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD, XINYI!!! Had the image that an evil-looking guy was telling me that with a smirk in his face.
Have to decide a project for myself, he said he's not giving me one... I got to have the initiative to come up with projects on my own; it has to have impact on the company and has to be within my capabilities and most importantly, I got to do them fast. Engineers cant drag, especically on the production line. Said that he's not going to spoon-feed IA students anymore, he's going to see what NP students are capable of... Told that to me and my LO right in the face, he's a tough guy. Got an email from my LO; said that though it's tough, I got to give in my best and to uphold NP's name... Things like, this is the first time a company decide to let a QA IA student do on-the-job based attachment and I can expect lots of excitment. Die! I can feel the pressure already... I feel so small there, so so small, so alone... Is that what working life all about?
He's pressing me for my project and so is Patrick. Said that I'm dragging far too long. But I was at a loss... All alone... Asked Patrick but all he said was, "As an engineer you got to think." Though now i got a brief idea but if my deduction is proved wrong, I'm back to square one!!! Still got another assignment on hand and it's so time consuming... He's waiting for the results too. But, I'm just like a stain, a dirt there. Especically at the production line, they are so busy and I had to disturb them in order to do my project and assignment. The way they look at you and it tells it all. Being chased around... So helpless... Beginning to doubt my abilities... But I have to face all these problems and obstacles. Well, see them as challenges and conquer them all. Otherwise I wont be able to survive till march.