Crying out aloudI'm sick of complaining about HIM. I'm training myself to keep my eyes, nose, ears or even my brain closed at command. Somehow or another I wish that he'll be gone soon. I know it's unfilial of me or rather us to curse him like that. Others may say, "After all, he's just an elderly, your grandfather..." But he's making our life going from bad to worse. Will any grandfather do that??? Guess he's the only one...I just want peace in my family, is that too much??? I HATE him. Think there will be no tears from him at his funeral.. At least from me... Even there's, there will only be tears of happiness. I know that I'm wrong to say that... It's a great sin. But nobody will understand... I'm just being true to myself, my own thinking and feelings here.
My uncle is "blaming" my parents for restricting me from going into university. He knows that I wanted to further my studies in a local University. Well, my parents are not to blame. It's my choice. I didnt tell them my decision. They didnt know that I didnt apply. Despite saying all that, I cant help but there's feeling of bitterness or rather filled with envy when others are being accepted into the University. But who knows, given my results, I may not be able be accepted after all.
Embarking a new route tomorrow. Stepping into the real working world tomorrow. Feeling nervous, excited despite having the 6 months attachment. Attachment, is for us to be prepared for the real world. That's what's people says... But somehow, it's different. Hope that those "training" that I had endured during attachment will come in handy. Just praying that the environment there is good and the people there are friendly and pleasant...