It's my health.... tsk tsk tsk... My MC are Almost ALMOST FULLY UTILIZED when it's just the beginning of October!!!!

Arghz.... Starting afresh from 2013 January till now, I've been sick Sick SICK.... Beside the common flu and frequent headaches.... Asthma attacks, skin allergy attacks, walking pneumonia, gastric ulcers (yes! with a ''S"" and a bleeding gastric ulcer which I'm almost cleared by the doctor already) and now.... A pyogenic granuloma thingy that grow on the tip of my thumb which I'll require a surgery to remove it since antibiotics' aren't working....

Since it's a growth of abnormal blood vessels, usually he will do an injection of local anesthesia and dono what thing to sort of stop the blood flow to that area and excision is done by surgically removing the entire growth and using stitches to close the wound which is the most effective and simple way to remove pyogenic granulomas BUT he cant do it for my case.... My heart sank and I sort of shut down after he said that..... I did hear parts of the explanation by the doctor that normal extraction by cutting and removing the lump of the abnormal blood vessels and stitching the wound back is almost impossible for my case due to the location of the growth for my case... And so I'll have to go for other alternatives like dono what surgery or laser and risking of reoccurrence of the growth when the entire blah blah blah is not removed.... Hence I might need to keep going back for this surgery... The skin tissues and that area of the finger is actually damaged and the tip of my thumb will never actually look the same again even after the surgery... blah blah blah..... I've to keep going back every 3 days to dress the wound and still continue with the antibiotics which gives me trouble and also the gastric pills which is supposed to prevent gastric... It only simply means more medicines!!! And I'll HAVE to get this removed coz it is not getting smaller or controlled in size by the week of medication and instead it is still growing and also it keep bleeding out of the blue....Ok, maybe I did hit the lump by accident or it's just simply like to bleed.. Ya, spontaneously bleeding rivers of blood... Or Volcano splitting bright red lava... Ok ok, leaving the gross part out... The bleeding is kinda scary coz somehow the bleeding is hard to stop and not to mention that it's painful....  The last bleeding took so long to stop that I got scared and thought 'what if the bleeding wont stop?' When I asked about the cost of the surgery.... He said 7-50 excluding the instruments and stuffs needed and medication and the subsequent dressing and consultation fees... OH MY GOSH!!! I guess it will easily sum up to over 1K to just remove a stoopie bloody lump?!!! Mind you, just 2 visits now over this already coz over $200+ already!!   

Y so suay sia??? 2013 isn't that kind to me arh.... My wallet is shrinking and my debts is on the rise coz of medical expenses... I exceeded the maximum medical expenses claimable covered by my company and had almost fully utilized all my MC entitlement...

While I was sinking in self-pity, self-misery and thinking of how much my poor body had suffered-and-yet-why-i'm-STILL-SO-PLUMB after going through the plague of 'sickness', this song was playing on my pc. hahaha... Just the right timing ar??  

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter

Having this part of the song 'Stronger' by Kelly Clarkson playing in a loop in my head now...
Nope, nope, I'm not being ditched, or having that special someone who left me thou.... I'm kinda in dates and I'm kinda happy being single. Hahahaha... . Counting Blessing now. I've decided to take more care of myself and my health.. Love myself more and treasure myself more!! Do what I like and be stronger! Ya, and I gonna start and call up tomorrow to confirm my schedule for my surgery and also my body check. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger~~~Stand a little taller~ What doesn't kill you makes a fighter~~~!!! Footsteps even lighter~~~!!!